This blog has become a little diary which not many know (which is somehow good!)

So I am experiencing hormonal changes
As like all expectant mothers.
I weep at the smallest thing.
But i don't dare to do it in front of anyone including to my other half
Just because, I feel that everyone feels that I am a strong woman
And strong woman don't cry
Its so hard to suppress the hormones raging inside.
I think I am crazy.
I get disappointed/sad/frustrated with things which I would not previously
It embarrassing to say the things which causes those feelings
Fuck it (its the hormones again)
There is no logic to anything and everything
I guess that is why pregnant woman gets pre or post natal depression.
The threat is so real now.

Do you ever hate yourself when being in a relationship?

Somehow, i do.

It seems to bring out the worse in me.

A lost sheep.

I seek comfort in my bed more than anywhere else in the world

Humans speak the truth when they are angry.
I see

Relationships are so fragile,
Once broken, it takes months, years and even generations to repair.
Same goes for the words out of one's mouth.
The ugly words just linger in your mind
Pollutes your head for many months and years

Sad, so sad. This month has been bad.
Every single fucking thing.

Well, I still take pride in them and trust things will be better.

The head is so heavy
These few days, have been tough.
Felt like things are meaningless
The constant stress.
Every single thing feels so stressful other than work.
Thought I found my safe house.
But I don't think so now.

I wish i can disappear from this world now.
And hope people will never remember me.

I am not good enough.
I know that I am not
Fight or Flight?

Sometimes i wish i am just better off not living in this world
And i don't deserve these love at all

2014 treated me well enough.
2015 will be better.
I will be
Stronger And Wiser
Life is too short for you to waste it
Live like there is no tomorrow